What’s Wrong With Banging Your Students?
SAN DIEGO (TNA) – What’s wrong with banging your students? I’ve done it. When I was a teacher, I did it a lot. In fact, I’ve had sex with at least a dozen students since I started teaching back in 1994. And you know what – I don’t feel an ounce of...
Dyslexic, ADHD-afflicted, Special-needs Medical Student Needs To Just Go Away
SAN DIEGO (TNA) – Sophie Currier needs to just go away. The mother of two and medical student needs to slip quietly into the Boston night, slink to the suburbs, and raise her two young children with the same zeal that she’s demonstrated in exploiting educational and legal systems on...
Canadians Beating Yanks In Bed Partners
ATLANTA (TNA) – It’s bad enough that the Canadian loonie is now worth as much as the U.S. dollar, but to add insult to injury; it looks as if those Canucks are beating us Yanks in the bedroom.According to a new survey by Durex Condoms, the average Canadian man has had at least...
SAN DIEGO (TNA) – Those skanky capuchin monkeys need to be removed from our nation’s research laboratories and returned to the jungles of South America, where they belong.The problem? They’re corrupting scientists with a degenerate behavior typically found in the lowest...
Alex The Parrot: Not As Beloved As Believed
WALTHAM, MA (TNA) – While academics and ornithologists mourn the loss of Alex, an African gray parrot renowned for his extraordinary linguistic ability, associates throughout the tight-knit parrot community are painting a less flattering picture of the bird who once appeared in a TV series...
Airline Hoochie Is The New Rosa Parks
SAN DIEGO (TNA) – Every era gets the civil-rights activist it deserves.Back in the 1960s, Rosa Parks inspired an entire generation by refusing to move to the back of the bus.In the ’80s, Nelson Mandela’s two-decade stint in a South African jail cell prompted folks...
SAN DIEGO (TNA) – Now this is the type of educational reform to get excited about.The State of Oregon is considering a bill that would allow ex-prostitutes with arrest records older than five years to become certified public school teachers. In case you missed it, last May, state...
Whenever people ask me about the biggest threat to the American male, I give it to ‘em straight: Feng Shui. Think about it. Do you know any guys – heterosexual guys -- who practice this bullshit pseudoscience?Of course not. Because men don’t care about that...
Dogfighting, No; Catfighting, Yes!
ATLANTA, Ga. (TNA) – Michael Vick is so stupid.He had everything going for him: a successful football career, lots of money from endorsements and yet he still felt compelled to finance the heinous sport of dog fighting.Why? It just seems crazy, especially when he could have...
Sorry For Writing This Article
SAN FRANCISCO (TNA) -- You wanna make more money? Be a sychophant.Cave to your boss at every turn.Above all, say “sorry.”According to a recent study of 7,590 Americans, high-earners apologize twice as often as low-earners.The study, conducted by pollsters Zogby International,...
SAN DIEGO (TNA) -- Forget Rohypnol. Bring back dimorphism.In the August 6 edition of the journal “Nature” comes evidence that two of our common ancestors, Homo Habilis and Homo Erectus, lived as contemporaries rather than descendants along the same evolutionary line.The...
